Postcards From My Mind: Perspectives of Asperger's Syndrome

Socialization

All living creatures both emit and interpret signals. On a basic level, this is how we interact with each other and survive. When people communicate, they generally use both verbal and nonverbal language to give and receive signals. Interpreting and understanding these signals and using inference enables us to predict what the other person is feeling or trying to say, in other words the Theory of Mind. The Theory of Mind is a person’s ability to attribute mental states to another person (for example, I think that Johnny is feeling sad).

People with Asperger’s syndrome are body language deaf. That means deaf to posture, gesture, eye contact, facial expression, and tone of voice. In essence, the only message that gets interpreted is literally what you are saying (as long as you are using concrete language). Neurologically typical people use a combination of “languages” to get their meaning across. For example, if I say, “I like you!” it’s very different than, “I like YOU?” Although the words are the same, the inferred meaning is different. When one is body language deaf, the only meaning that can be interpreted is what the words say.

When one doesn’t understand nonverbal cues (such as those listed above), social interaction is very difficult. It is easy to initiate a conversation – they’re only so many ways that one can start a conversation. To continue a conversation is more difficult. It is then that one needs to interpret nonverbal cues in order to know what to say next. Take for example the conversation below:

1. Jake: Hi Kathy, how are you?
2. KATHY: I’m OK. What are you doing tonight?
3. Jake: Well, my uncle passed away, so his wake is this evening.
4. KATHY: Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. Is there anything I can do?
5. Jake: No thanks.

Once you get past the hellos, one must be able to read nonverbal cues to understand what the next line should be. Take line 3 &4. Write down Kathy’s possible reactions if (a) Jake was very close and loved his uncle, or (b) if Jake hated his uncle and said the sentence sarcastically.

In 1996 I sat in Harvard Square, where there are several busy urban cafes, and videotaped people’s conversations. Later I studied the conversations, wrote them down, and analyzed them. What did they have in common? What made their conversations seem so natural?

 

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